Great old commercial

by Caleb Reading

I’m watching a show called “Greatest car commercials” or something like that. They just showed an old Volkswagon Beetle ad that you guys might get a kick out of. It showed a funeral procession of fancy cars filled with hoity toity types and one black beetle trailing behind with a regular looking guy in a regular black suit. The voiceover went:

I, Max [last name], being of sound mind and body, do bequeath the following:

To my wife Rose who spent money like there was no tomorrow, I leave one hundred dollars and a calender.

To my sons Rodney and Victor, who spent every dime I ever gave them on fancy cars and fast women, I leave fifty dollars in dimes.

To my business partner Jules, whose only motto was “Spend! Spend! Spend!”, I leave nothing, nothing, nothing.

And to my other friends and relatives who never learned the value of a dollar, I leave one dollar.

Finally, to my nephew Harold, who oftentimes said, “A penny saved is a penny earned”, and who also oftentimes said, “Gee, uncle Max, it sure pays to own a Volkswagon”, I leave my entire fortune of one hundred billion dollars.